The Mummy (2017)

What’s the bet Brendan Fraser is smiling right now?

An ancient princess is awakened from her crypt beneath the desert, bringing with her malevolence grown over millennia, and terrors that defy human comprehension.

Where to start? Well, would you believe it or not, there were six writers for this… SIX! Shocker, right?! Alex Kurtzman’s The Mummy, aka The Tom Cruise Show is tonally a motherfucking mess. Is it an action? Horror? Comedy? Whatever, it was trying to be, what I know is that it’s not the best start for what was going to be the highly anticipated Dark Universe saga.

To have a movie about a Mummy and have no Egypt is almost insulting. However, not as insulting as every character in this 110-minute mess. Tom Cruise, I think is meant to be a loveable rogue but comes more across as unlikeable asshole. Annabelle Wallis’s character brings absolutely nothing to the story, except having to be saved repeatedly by Mr Cruise. Is it getting more obvious that six men wrote this? Lastly, lets just pretend Jake Johnson wasn’t in this film, his ‘comic’ relief is so cringey, it was difficult to sit through. The attempt at comedy here is so on the nose that it hurts, it hurts like a punch in the nose.

The only redeeming feature of The Mummy were Russell Crowe and Sofia Boutella, who both killed it with that they were given. Crowe is charming with his shonky British accent and Boutella is a goddess on screen. It’s just a shame Boutella wasn’t given more screen time to really give her character some depth, instead we are given a very bland exposition heavy backstory.

Technically, Kurtzman has a very well made movie on his hands. The action scenes are undeniably impressive but it isn’t enough to rescue it from still being very dull. There is no balance between action and horror or horror and comedy which is what Brendan Fraser’s 1999 version exceeds so perfectly at. Which is why it is possibly my all time favourite guilty pleasure movie, it is perfectly cheesy in all the right places.

The Mummy has no scares, no laughs and leaves no desire to step into the Dark Universe. Please Hollywood Executives, don’t harm any other classic horror icons with your explosions and bad jokes. Leave it to the people who care about the monsters and not about the money.

3.0 /10

“Welcome to a new world of gods and monsters”

 

Alien: Covenant (2017)

When one Michael Fassbender just isn’t enough…

The crew of a colony ship, bound for a remote planet, discover an uncharted paradise with a threat beyond their imagination, and must attempt a harrowing escape.

Ridley Scott’s next instalment in the Alien franchise, Alien: Covenant, has made its landing. While being ominously atmospheric yet beautifully shot, this sci-fi thriller is a welcoming return to a series that unfortunately seems to hold a majority of people questioning whether we really needed the reboot? Remake? Prequel? Prequel sequel? Whatever you wish to call it.

I may be in the minority here, but I’m rather enjoying the expansion into the Alien universe. Covenant successfully builds upon the franchises core themes; science, religion, man, myth, life, death and creation. It never feels like the creative team have dove in for a quick cash grab that most sequels/prequels fall prey to. Covenant cleverly peppers us with new information on the mythology of its monsters, whilst gifting us with a new kind of evil.

Covenant is far from perfect though. Its major problem is its characters. From a crew of around 15 (?) there are only a handful of memorable personas, the rest remain completely non descript. There is zero time spent building the minor characters any story or depth, and before I could even grasp who’s who they are dead.

A major disappointment to comprehend was that the theatrical cut of the film seemed to drop the essence that this crew was to be made up of couples in relationships, which seemed heavily implied in the films earlier marketing. A curious aspect that that would have worn well, but for reasons unbeknownst it is hardly mentioned and therein these characters lose some edge and depth and any interest in whether they live or die drops away.

Those few characters that do happen to stand out, stand out strongly. Fassbender gracefully plays both parts of good versus evil, and has a completely mesmerizing on screen presence. Katherine Waterston is a fine Ripley-esque female lead. But, the biggest surprise was Danny McBride, who for once refreshingly downplayed his usual caricature playfulness with a much more dramatic turn.

Alien Covenant is grungey as hell and no doubt an upgrade from Ridley’s previous 2012 entry, Prometheus. Covenant is gritty, well crafted, with dry almost campy humour. This new generation isn’t as much about the monsters, but rather a chilling saga for the character of David. Which sits absolutely fine with me. For the next instalment, I expect only a whole orchestra of homo erotic Fassbenders playing musical instruments.

7.0 / 10

“Serve in Heaven or reign in Hell?”

Hounds of Love (2017)

 

Smiths Chips will never be the same again…

 A cold blooded predatory couple while cruising the streets in search of their next victim, will stumble upon a 17-year-old high school girl, who will be sedated, abducted and chained in the stranger’s guest room.

Another gritty Australian entry for the month of May, with Ben Young’s astonishing directorial debut, Hounds of Love. Upon first glance, one would think this simply to be another entry into the poor subgenre of torture porn, but Young has twisted the narrative and instead at its core Hounds of Love is a tragic story of a relationship malfunctioning. For this tale, we are shown the side of the captors, and instead of being a predictable tale of one woman escaping abuse, it’s a tale of two.

Hounds of Love is powerfully acted, it is a trio tour de force of performances from the leading stars – Stephen Curry, Emma Booth and Ashleigh Cummings. For us locals, we recognize Curry as a very much loveable and generally adorable stand-up comedian so it is a complete shock to the system to see him pull off such a terrifying slimy performance of what could be one of the most heinous, sleaziest characters imagined.

It is easily understandable that these subgenres are definitely an acquired taste, but Hounds has more class than any ol’ torture porn flick. It is violent in nature, but mostly the nastiest moments are implied. Young leaves us to use the darkest depths of our imagination to make sense of what is going on behind closed doors.

Young has pulled off a remarkable entrance by successfully traumatising audiences around the world with his low budget gem, the gritty realism is disturbing and the performances are downright riveting. Hounds of Love is a knock out.

8.0 / 10

“I’ll tell you what. How about… you and I… go in there right now and show her who’s running the show?”

Killing Ground (2017)

Not exactly a movie for Tourism Australia…

A couples camping trip turns into a frightening ordeal when they stumble across the scene of a horrific crime.

Writer/Director Damien Power delivers an exceptionally powerful feature film debut with Killing Ground. A classic throwback to the Australian Ozploitation era of the 1970s/80s, Killing Ground is a blunt, bloody and brutal journey of a deadly game of cat and mouse. Don’t expect your normal stalker/slasher tropes, Killing Ground transcends any clichés with a pretty simple storyline but with an imaginative non chronological timeline structure.

The real grittiness of Killing Ground is its violence and what it does to people. There are no cheap scares with Killing Ground and although incredibly violent, Powers avoids showing any graphic displays of gratuitous bloodshed. Rather it is mostly shockingly implied and it is the Australian landscape that will once again terrorize audiences with an atmosphere absolutely drenched in dread.

The performances from Killing Ground are unforgettable, Harriet Dyer as young camper Sam is a strong female lead that delivers a white knuckling performance, followed by Aaron Glenane’s psychotic Chook, which feels almost too genuine. Aaron Pedersen also is strong here, going against his normal type cast and playing into the part of the villainous duo.

A minimal yet powerful story, Killing Ground has a real gritty aesthetic and an authenticity that will make some scenes difficult to watch. The cinematography will undoubtedly keep you holding your breath, the steady tracking shots eerily grasping your attention when you want to look away. Only coming in at 88 minutes, a little more exposition on the malicious men would have been inviting, otherwise Killing Ground is absolutely tense throughout and another great entry into the Australian genre.

7.0 / 10

“There were people here earlier and their heading out to the falls”